“Emotional detachment is a state of calmness, and the ability to not be emotionally agitated by people events and your own thoughts…it is an attitude of common sense, open mindedness and practical behavior” – What is Emotional Detachment
Detachment is an art I am tirelessly working to practice. Have you ever had a scenario made up in your head, you get so worked up over every detail of HOW it should turn out, only to have it not happen, or be completely different than what you had made up? If your like me, these kinds of things can emotionally crush you. Unless of course, you learn to practice Detachment.
A few years ago I met a young teenage girl through (at the time) very close friends. This girl had a rough up-bringing, bounced from home to home, emotional abuse from her mother, physical abuse from the people she loved and trusted most, and a very stubborn and impatient attitude. Beyond all her flaws and brokenness I saw a little girl who longed to belong, have a safe feeling of home, and people who truly cared about her. Me being the big hearted love spreader I am fell in love with this child and wanted to do all I could to “save” her. As per usual, it blew up in my face. Imagine that. And for a while I was crushed, completely broken that she’d end up treating me the exact same way she’d treated everyone else….but it’s like they say, a snake can shed its skin a million times, but will always be a snake.
I had to learn to detach myself, not because I don’t love her, or I no longer care about her, but because I deserve peace and calmness. I did the best job I could do, and no matter how badly I wanted things to be different, she has her own reality and world and her own way of doing things, and who am I to say if they are wrong or right? Because to her and for her they are right. And that is fine….see detached but still full of love, just ready to move on from that chapter.
Detachment is something that comes in handy almost every day! You ever have a few minutes to yourself, and you just want to relax but that nagging voice inside your head just will not shut up?! Making you feel all the feels about things you don’t want to feel about? Reminding you about that late bill? Or that project at work you should have done a little more on? Learning to detach yourself from the worries of things you can not control can completely change your life! Learning to be mindful of your body and brain, giving it both time to rest and exercise can give you back the balance that leads to optimal health.
In order to be happy and healthy you have to find that balance, meditation, exercise, proper nutrition and ample rest are all things that will help your body regulate and find its balance, and by learning to be detached from trivial nonscense can send you into total euphoria.
Give it a try, sit down in a quiet place and just be still. Be quiet. When that voice starts, silence it. You have the power, concentrate harder on being grounded, becoming one with your surroundings, quiet your mind. Once you’ve got the hang of quieting it during meditation, give it a try in your day to day, when something stressful or annoying happens think “is this something that will matter in 5 minutes? Is this serving me any good? Does this directly effect my personal life?” If all those answers are no, detach. Believe me your life and emotional well being will drastically improve!
Did you try it, let me know how it went!!